GENEVIEVE CALVARY HILDEGARD





iamhawtieshawty




Wednesday, June 29, 2011

L.O.V.E

When you think of your past love, you may view it as a failure. But when you find a new love,you view the past as a teacher. In the game of love, it doesn’t really matter who won or who lost. What is important is you know when to hold on and when to let go! You know you really love someone when you want him or her to be happy, even if their happiness means that you’re not part of it. Everything happens for the best. If the person you love doesn’t love you back, don’t be afraid to love someone else again, for you’ll never know unless you give it a try. You’ll never love a person you love unless you risk for love.Love strives in hurting. If you don’t get hurt, you don’t learn how to love. Love doesn’t hurt all the time. Though the hurting is still there to test you, to help you grow.

Don’t find love, let love find you. That’s why it’s called falling in love because you don’t force yourself to fall. You just Fall. You cannot finish a book without closing its chapters. If you want to go on, then you have to leave the past as you turn the pages.Love is not destroyed by a single failure or won by a single caress. It is a lifetime venture in which we are always learning, discovering and growing. The greatest irony of love is letting go when you need to hold on and holding on when you need to let go.We lose someone we love only when we are destined to find someone else who can love us even more than we can love ourselves. On falling out of love, take some time to heal and then get back on track. But don’t ever make the same mistake of following the same one that threw you the first time.

To love is to risk rejection; to live is to risk dying, to hope is to risk failure. But risk must be taken because the greatest hazard in life is risking nothing! To reach for another is to risk involvement, to expose your feelings is to expose true self; to love is to risk not to be loved in return.How to define love: fall but do not stumble, be constant but not too persistent, share and never be unfair, understand and try not to demand, hurt but never keep the pain.Love is like a knife. It can stab the heart or it can carve wonderful images into the soul that always last for a lifetime.Love is supposed to be the most wonderful feeling. It should inspire you and give you joy and strength. But sometimes the things that give you joy can also hurt you in the end.Loving people means giving them the freedom that they choose to be and where they choose to be. For all the heartaches and the tears, for gloomy days and fruitless years, you should give thanks, for you know, that there were the things that helped you grow.

Loving someone means giving him the freedom to find his way, whether it leads towards you or away from you.Love is a painful risk to take but the risk must be taken no matter how scary or painful, for only then you’ll experience the fullness of humanity and that is love. Only love can hurt your heart, fill you with desire and tear you apart. Only love can make you cry and only love knows why. If you’re not ready to cry, if you’re not ready to take the risk, if you’re not ready to feel the pain, then you’re not ready to fall in love. There was a time in our lives when we became afraid to fall in love because every time we do, we get hurt, then I figured that’s why it’s called falling in love. '

so true :)

Friday, June 17, 2011

Sahabat,Friends,bakih kui







p/s: 3 years bersama wlpn susah ngan senang semua bersama,
salah silap pekara biasa.sedih,rindu smua cya.wlpn baru sehari im staying alone start frow now.
hope will be friends forever.miss the moments we together..=)

My Gawai Expression.






during my Gawai 2011 i was celebrating my precious days with my New Family mambers.
Thankx Methushael and family,embak me balit Gawai.
1stly was speechless cause xda air and electric.
But alot of experiences ..having fun, bored, laugh, sad, crying.. all are there.

Friday, May 27, 2011

what is wrong if i'm single?

feeling. :D. First of all, i cannot stop receiving questions and comments from friends and families. Why? can i stay single for a while?it's not like i'm gonna die. I'm happy with my life now and try to move on with it. Past is past,future is yet to be unfold. The best things when i'm single, i can spend times with my friends and go out with anyone. :) haha! spend here and there. I love making friends. Its doesn't care where they are. :) although if they not friendly,its a different story all together. :D haha! but other than that,i love my friends as they always with me when i'm sad and happy! so stop complaining why am i single. I love it now. I have much more freedom than when i got bf. :D not an emo btw. Just expressing my feeling. :D

Maybe its true. But sometimes things are not like they suppose to be. There are time when we go through hardships. Friends are always the best mate ever. But unlikely for me, some of my friends are tend to go leaving me when i need them the most. They only come to me to seek for help but most of the time when i need them, they seem vanish.For now maybe i can enjoy myself with what i had. Who know right? maybe world really gonna end soon.

Struggling time @-@


Why am I talking about stress? Because now I'm stress. Hahaha~ Everyone know about stress but do u think u really know about stress?

Ok... I have final exam this week. Every subject I have to struggle so that I will get a good result(just like what's my mom and dad hoping from me).
2 weeks ago before final exam.
  • Sleep less. I don't have enough sleep. I mean like I sleep at 5 in the morning. I can sleep but don't know why, start from 12 in the midnight, if I still not sleep, I will not sleep until 3 am(minimum) or worst 6 am(maximum). Then, wake up at 8 o'clock for the class. Crazy~ But I don't feel sleepy in the class, seriously... I think I have insomnia.
  • Laziness. I started to be the worst girl ever! Just kidding. I'm lazy to go to the class, I don't feel like I want to study, I don't even look at my book, I don't feel like I want to cook... All I can think is fun, fun, fun...
  • Emotional. Seriously, I feel so alone. Even I have a boyfriend before, I don't feels like one. We fighting and fighting. He realize that I'm getting change a lot but he didn't told me until we break up. Then, I started to cried always. Even when I'm talking with my mom, I cried. Once, I told my mom, "Mummy, I think I might crazy one day."Guess what she said..? "Don't say like that. I'm not sending u there to be crazy. The treatment cost for crazy people is more expensive than sending u schooling." She was right anyway.
  • Eat more. Well, I love to eat. In my hostel, I am the only one who eat much than my other house mates. But now, it's getting worse. I eat twice than what I eat before. My cheeks become big but weird... my body still skinny. Aiyo~
That is the symptoms of chronic stress. I have chronic stress which I never been in that kind of stress. How do I know I got that kind of stress? We learn about psychology. In psychology, we learn about stress. Stress is divide into 2, eustress and distress. In distress, there are two kind of distress, acute stress and chronic stress. Chronic stress is a negative stress which is really not good for our body. I just know about that also after I make a revision for psychology subject yesterday. I explain to u guys clearly right?

This week it's become worse.
  • Sleep more. Ok... Last week I don't get enough sleep but this week I sleep half a day. 12 hours dude. Because this is exam week, like usual, I don't sleep at midnight because that is the times for me to study. I sleep at 5 or 6 in the morning and wake up at 9 because the exam started at 10 o'clock. After finished exam papers, I went to sleep. Unfortunately, I sleep until tomorrow morning, 12 in the afternoon. Haiz~
  • Eat triple. I still eat twice more than what I usually eat but this times, become worse. I eat every 1 hour. But still I'm skinny. I'm pretty sure I got a high cholesterol. For your information, skinny people have a high cholesterol than fat people. That's the fact.
  • Lazy? Don't mention about it. I'm still lazy no matter what. But I force myself to study. That's why I get stress a lot.
  • Emotion? Errmmm... I feel like dumb people. Every time I finished answering my exam paper, I feel like I want to cry. Want to know why? Because I can't answer it 50% of the questions. But like high school people always did.. Hantam saja! Conclusion: study early before u regret.
How to deal with stress?
~ Learn how to manage stress. that's important.
~ strengthen your relationship with people surround u. That can reduce your stress.
~ Learn how to relax. Relax can help u thinking better.
~ Invest in your emotional health. Think positive always.

After I realize about my stress lately, I start to calm down a bit and remind myself. Where is the old Gene? Well, because of the stress, I became like this. Huh~ Hopefully I will be back be I was before. Yea, I am slowly to be me again now. ;)

Wednesday, May 25, 2011

Imperfection

I know i'm freaking anal

I hate myself for being somehow a perfectionist

Totally disgusted by this feeling of self-consciousness

What a hypocrite i am.



I know myself
so,
STOP JUDGING ME
That does't help me making a better person